Studying

One of those "dirty little secrets" that I have had for a long time is that I very rarely study the bible. You would think that as a person who was very keen on getting back to where God wants me the past year plus that I would whole-heartedly run toward the scripture. However, I have known that I should dive deep into His word.

I attempted to jumpstart myself in that manner earlier this year by reading the whole bible in 90 days. Yes, I actually completed it. The problem is that I went from wanting to do this to see it as a full story and a complete illustration of God to a person who was slowly just desiring the goal to be reached. There is no learning going on when you are just wanting to "get done". Then when you are finished with the whole bible, you feel like you have just completed a novel. How many people when they are finished with a novel goes back to reread a chapter that was just read? None that I know of. So, I hindered myself in this regard. I started the task with the wrong intentions. I wanted to accomplish reading the bible. It wasn't some spiritual journey that I was taking, but a reading assignment that I gave myself. Thus, I have struggled since wanting to dive back in.

I finally got around to trying something new. A friend pointed out to me a new method. They suggested that I started reading one chapter a week of any book. During that week, you read that chapter every day and you read whatever commentaries, histories, etc about that chapter and that book. What a great concept! I loved the idea. Where to start was what filled my mind. The next Sunday or so our pastor was talking about Zechariah and used it in his message. I thought, that sounds cool, maybe I will try there. I didn't think much about resources since we are now in the information age and can find pretty much anything on the internet, right? Well, that was a mistake. I lasted about 3 weeks. I gave up trying to find stuff online to read. I basically felt defeated. I felt like I failed. However, I do know the truth. If I had continued on, without trying to admit my mistake, that would have been worse.

Instead, I am starting all over. I don't just mean with a new book, I mean with a new outlook. I am starting as if I am a new Christian. Rather than just believing what I have been taught all these years about, "just read the bible", I started by listening to a sermon by Mark Driscoll from Mars Hill Church in Seattle. What a powerful message. I don't care how long you have been part of God's kingdom, this message will open your eyes at least a little. To me, its a lot. I won't go into a lot of what he says but just a few points.

The question that you have to ask yourself is what is your motive for studying scripture. That question will change why or how you are doing it all by itself. Just thinking about why you are doing something causes you to pause. It causes you to delve into your desires for the exercise. Driscoll points out that the purpose for reading the bible is relational and not functional. Just let that sink in. You read to bring more depth to your relationship with God. From that relationship, you will get the functional aspect that you were searching for, though it might not be in the manner you had originally thought.

Once you figure out your motive, then you worry about the method. This really helped me see my desire to read Zechariah not as a failure but as a challenge. Im not ready for it. I can admit that. There are things in that book that later in my spiritual walk will be useful to me, but I don't get them yet. Instead, God has something for me elsewhere in His word. The point that stuck out to me here from Driscoll is that you must pray. Seems pretty obvious, huh? Well, when you think about it this way, its revealing to me. He says that all scripture is inspired by God through the Holy Spirit and is made so that you need the Holy Spirit ministering to you for understanding. If you don't pray and get that ministering, you might miss the point of it. By praying, you are relying on God for your understanding instead of what you can come up with. I tend to think that God is a little smarter than myself.

I don't know if this encourages others or just is a great way for me to vent this all out as I learn it, but its something good to think about. If you would like to listen to this sermon, its on Mars Hill's website in the media library.